[ti:Can I Bitch] [ar:EMINEM] [al:Straight From The Lab] [offset:500] [00:00.49] Can I Bitch [00:01.09] [in a high falsetto voice] [00:12.39] Uncle Marshall! [00:14.48] Will you tell us a bedtime story? [00:18.20] [regular voice] [00:19.03] Here we go... [00:19.22] [00:21.62] Now once upon a time not long ago [00:23.28] There was a little rapper about to blow [00:25.73] But his album came and it was not good [00:28.02] I think it went lead or double copper wood [00:30.05] So the silly little fans they were mislead [00:32.36] By a nerdy internet computer hip-hop head [00:34.57] "Me and you, 'Clef, we're gonna make some cash [00:36.79] Grab the silver paint and let's paint my ass" [00:39.08] Hey mister, would ya care to bare witness to [00:41.58] The ass-whippin' I'm about to administer [00:43.71] To this ass-kissin' little vaginal blister [00:45.71] Stanabis, little Marshall Mathers' sister [00:47.90] And in this corner, we have the mister [00:50.14] Not havin' it, it's the mad sinister [00:52.49] Dr. Evil with his bag of tricks for [00:54.73] this little antagonist faggot dick-suckin' [00:57.00] Ex-LL Cool J fan from Windsor [00:59.10] I'm 'bout to murder little Kenny fag Keniff-sta [01:01.47] You bastard I ain't wanna have to diss ya [01:03.58] Canabis, where the fuck you at? I miss ya! [01:04.55] [Chorus] [01:06.00] Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch [01:08.32] Where for art thou Can-i-bitch? [01:10.57] Please tell me what happened with [01:12.78] That style that you were rappin' with [01:15.01] Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch [01:17.18] Are you from Los Angeles [01:19.39] New York or just a janitor [01:21.57] From Canada? Oh Can-i-bitch [01:23.92] [01:24.28] Now at first I ain't really understand the shit [01:25.98] Picture me for a second and imagine it [01:28.24] Chillin' in the Bat-Mansion and relaxin' [01:30.42] When all a sudden some bullshit comes across the scanners [01:32.66] It's Can-i-bitch on some "Stan Lives" shit [01:35.25] It creeped me out at first. Man this is sick [01:37.31] For me, being just a sick, this conflict [01:39.54] Gets my dick harder than arithmetic [01:41.68] And I know how you jealous ones envy [01:43.86] I shoulda knew better from the first few letters you sent me [01:46.05] The first two letters you were tellin' me shit [01:48.35] Like you respect me, like any other regular MC [01:50.80] The third letter you ask how come I ain't return [01:53.49] None of the messages at Shady Records you left me [01:55.26] The fourth letter: "Slim, you really startin' to upset me!" [01:57.57] The fifth letter told me you were comin' to get me [01:59.79] The sixth letter there's a bomb threat in our building [02:01.99] This crazy motherfucker's really tryin' to kill me! [02:04.18] So I went back and read the first few letters that said [02:06.71] Some shit about a message you left [02:08.67] Oh shit, that's not an "E" that's an "A" [02:11.03] This dude wants to leave me a "massage," he's gay!! [02:13.17] Right away I'm on the phone with Dr. Dre [02:15.38] We got a bogey! (Marshall I'm on the way) [02:16.35] [02:17.22] [Chorus] [02:18.01] Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch [02:19.83] Where for art thou Can-i-bitch? [02:22.15] Please tell me what happened with [02:24.30] That style that you were rappin' with [02:26.53] Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch [02:28.89] Are you from Los Angeles [02:31.06] New York or just a janitor [02:33.16] From Canada? Oh Can-i-bitch [02:35.41] [02:35.81] So in two seconds flat Dre's at my crib [02:37.63] The funny thing is we both know where this kid lives [02:39.86] And neither one of us have Canadian citizenship [02:42.02] Shit. Oh Dre, wait a mintue that's it [02:44.56] All we gotta do is use a bit of turbo boost [02:46.47] We can fly over the border "Let's go" [WOOSH!] [02:48.99] So we're off to Toronto and we're gainin' speed [02:51.06] [BOOSH!] (What was that? Oh) Jermaine Dupri [02:53.29] Fuck It, keep goin' no time to waste [02:55.41] Wait, backup hit him one more time in case [02:57.72] Okay .. fuck now he's draggin' under the car [03:00.00] Oh well, only 30 more thousand miles [03:02.44] Meanwhile me and Dre are tryin' to conversate [03:04.46] Just tryin' to find a reason for the constant hate [03:06.59] And tryin' to figure out what happened to 'Germaine Propaine' [03:08.24] [03:08.40] "He couldn't have fell off that hard" Ain't no way [03:11.20] "What happened to the way you was rappin' when you was scandalous [03:13.16] That Canibus turned into a television evangelist" [03:16.40] Plus he raps with his regular voice [BOOSH! BOOSH!] [BOOSH! BOOSH!] [03:19.38] (What was that?) Pet Shop Boys [03:20.45] So we pull up to the bridge where he last was spotted [03:22.67] His corpse was still movin' but his ass was rotted [03:24.98] He kinda smelled a little like Courtney Love [03:27.14] I figure if I stick him with a fork he's done [03:29.42] So I stabbed him twice, kept jabbin', Christ [03:31.96] He won't die, this guy's like a battered wife [03:33.96] He's like Kim, he keeps comin' back for more [03:36.02] But he won't fight back I cracked his jaw [03:38.29] Hold up, 'Bis quit foldin' up! [03:40.57] Punch me in the chest! Make my shoulders touch! [03:42.86] Do somethin'! At least one punchline [03:45.10] C'mon till the meter reads 9-9-9- [03:47.93] ty-nine percent of my fans are blonde [03:49.51] 'Bis c'mon answer me man respond! [03:51.78] Tell me 'bout the sun rain moon and stars [03:54.04] Intergalatical metaphors from Mars! [03:56.24] Raw to the floor, raw like Reservoir Dogs [03:58.58] Bite another line from Redman's song! [04:00.76] Suddenly the stub from a dead man's arm [04:02.92] From a midget reaches out from under the car [04:05.13] It's JD, this motherfucker won't die neither [04:07.55] Dre starts sprayin' him with cans of ether [04:09.73] We stomped the bitch and then stopmed the bitch again [04:12.09] (Compton!) Detroit bitch! Talk some shit again! [04:14.29] Stomp him! (switch feet) Stomp him! (switch again!) [04:16.60] Dre alright he's dead dog, quit kickin him! [04:18.92] I think Stanabis jumped off the bridge again (Damn) [04:21.56] He disappeared yo he's gone he did it again [04:23.00] [Chorus] [04:23.07] Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch [04:25.60] Where for art thou Can-i-bitch? [04:27.84] Please tell me what happened with [04:30.12] That style that you were rappin' with [04:32.30] Can-i-bitch, oh Can-i-bitch [04:34.61] Are you from Los Angeles [04:36.76] New York or just a janitor [04:38.88] From Canada? Oh Can-i-bitch