Denis Leary i m an asshole LRC歌詞

Folks, Id like to sing a song about the American dream. About me, about
you, about the way our American hearts beat way down in the bottom of our
chests. About the special feeling we get in the cockles of our hearts,
maybe below the cockles, maybe in the subcockle area. Maybe in the liver,
maybe in the kidneys, maybe even in the colon. We dont know.
Im just an average Joe with a regular job
Im your average White suburbanite slob
I like football and porno and books about war
Ive got an average house with a nice hardwood floor
My wife and my job, my kids and my car
My feet on the table and a Cuban cigar
But sometimes that just aint enough
To keep a man like me interested
(Oh no) No way (Uh-uh)
No, Ive got to go out and have fun
At someone elses expense
(Oh yeah) Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
I drive really slow in the ultrafast lane
While people behind me are going insane
Im an a*shole (Hes an a*shole, what an a*shole)
Im an a*shole (Hes an a*shole, such an a*shole)
I use public toilets and I piss on the seat
I walk around in the summertime saying, "How about this heat?"
Im an a*shole (Hes an a*shole, what an a*shole)
Im an a*shole (Hes the worlds biggest a*shole)
Sometimes I park in handicapped spaces
While handicapped people make handicapped faces
Im an a*shole (Hes an a*shole, what an a*shole)
Im an a*shole (Hes a real f**king a*shole)
Maybe I shouldnt be singing this song
Ranting and raving and carrying on
Maybe theyre right when they tell me Im wrong
Naaaah!
Im an a*shole (Hes an a*shole, what an a*shole)
Im an a*shole (Hes the worlds biggest a*shole)
You know what Im gonna do? Im gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac Eldorado
convertible, hot pink, with whaleskin hubcabs and all leather cow interior
and big brown baby seal eyes for headlights. Yeah! And Im gonna drive
around in that baby at 115 MPH getting on mile per gallon, sucking down
quarter pounder cheeseburgers from McDonalds in the old-fashioned
non-biodegradable styrofoam containers, and when Im done suckin down
those greaseball burgers, Im gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag
and then Im gonna toss the styrofoam container right out the side and
there aint a goddamned thing anybody can do about it. You know why?
Because we got the bombs, thats why.
Two words: Nuclear f**king weapons, okay? Russia, Germany, Romania-they
can have all the democracy they want. They can have a big democracy
cakewalk right through the middle of Tiananmen Square and it wont make a
lick of difference because we got the bombs, okay? John Waynes not
dead-hes frozen. And as soon as we find the cure for cancer were gonna
thaw out the Duke and hes gonna be pretty pissed off. You know why? Have
you ever taken a cold shower? Well, multiply that by 15,000,000 times,
thats how pissed off the Dukes gonna be. Im gonna get the Duke and John
Ca*savetes
And Lee Marvin
And Sam Peckinpah
And a case of whisky and drive down to Texas...
(Hey, you know, you really are an a*shole)
Why dont you just shut up and sing the song, pal!
Im an a*shole (Hes an a*shole, what an a*shole)
Im an a*shole (Hes the worlds biggest a*shole)
A-S-S-H-O-L-E Everybody! A-S-S-H-O-L-E
Arf arf arf arf arf arf arf
Fung achng tum a fung tuma fling chum
Oooh oooh
Im an a*shole and proud of it!

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